48 -THE FRILL OF IT ALL!

I never learned such as jacks. Then on to educational tapes of female reproductive cycles and even several actual birth tapes! At first I had to look away but Susan said, "Watch that...a man did that to her and it's part of being a woman!"

I became very aware of my monthly cycle and the levels of different female hormones flowing through my veins. Having a monthly mood cycle was another undeniable sign of where I was headed. While I didn't have menstruation, I was under the same mysterious force that turns women into unstable cry babies.

Having a cycle was actually pretty cool because it was a elusive source of feelings, elations and carnal sensations----even with the inconvenience of wearing what women wear five or six days a month.

Growing from a regular guy into a woman is a impressive thing. As a man, it was like living in California with no seasons. Under the cycle of hormones, my body was constantly maturing, evolving, preparing for the next stage of life. Many seasons every month! Life was in color, not black and white! I was hooked.

I stopped fighting it and cherished what was going on in my miraculous new body in any given 28 days? Let me give you an idea of what I went through.

My cycle's "day one" was when I ran out of pills on the little cardboard container. For whatever reason, Day One of a woman's cycle is counted as the first day they see that telltale spot of blood. For me it was when I ran out of estrogen and progesterone pills on day 28. When I run out of pills after being pumped up, my body is ready for a rest.

The progesterone makes me feel bloated. Free of hormones, I suddenly feel tired and sometimes cramps. For seven days I am off female hormones and I can feel my maleness trying to fight back.

It's fight back is short lived. On day seven, I start taking estrogen pills again. On that day my body's estrogen level is at its lowest and the day I most feel like I did before.

From day seven to day twenty eight, the estrogen level builds again to suppress male function. The

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estrogen effects my brain and would be stimulating an egg and getting it ready for ovulation. . .if I were female.

It effects all the parts of my body, as estrogen levels grow my breasts get puffy and ripe. If I were a woman and got pregnant, my body would be setting up the fertilized egg with the sustenance it needs to grow into a baby.

By day Day 13-14, my body is chemically ready for Ovulation!! Estrogen levels are raging and my body just rarin' to go. I get a little twinge or cramp in my lower back and I feel warm. My body temperature rises half a degree or a degree and stays up until day 28.

It's such an whimsical sensation to know that hormonally I could get pregnant days 12-17.

On day 18, I start taking progesterone pills for ten days. It prepares a woman's body for pregnancy...but for me all it really does is make me retain fluid and builds up the protein, sugar and blood necessary to nourish a fertilized female body.

Progesterone is the biggest ingredient in PMS, and I generally feel a little crabby. With both progesterone and estrogen levels still increasing with each day, I feel soreness in my breasts, bloating and food cravings.

Susan told me that the last ten days of my cycle, with the high progesterone and estrogen levels, was the most feminizing time of my cycle. My testosterone producers were being "beat up" by the combination---coming back with less vigor each month.

I usually have a little PMS the last few days. How does PMS feel? Take a hotdog and put it in the microwave for twenty minutes on high! I hate the bloated feeling and feel like dish-water until I run out of pills...then I'm back to Day One.

Pretty nifty cycle? Well, my body was being transformed dramatically by it. There wasn't much change from day to day, but by the end of a year, my life and body were very different from the way they were when I was testosterone driven.

More than just the development of feminine con-